It was a peaceful July evening and I was minding my own business when I heard my human parents rummaging around in the basement. Since I consider the basement to be my personal territory, I immediately began to slink down the stairs to see what was going on down there.Before I could sneak through the pet door into the utility side of the lower level to take a peek, the door opened and my human mom came out, carrying the dreaded thing. I don't know what it's called, but it's a sort of torture device. You can see it pictured above.
Now, I remembered the thing from previous occasions. This is how it works: to get me to go inside its teenie tiny space, they put my favorite blanket inside and plant a few treats and toys inside, counting on my curious nature. Once I go inside, they slam the door shut and lock it, leaving me inside. What happens next is unspeakable. They carry it outside to the car, put the thing on the back seat, STRAP it with the seatbelt (are you kidding me??) and drive me to a secret location, bring me inside some stranger's lair, and relegate me to a restricted area called a "kitty condo, "where they leave me for days, weeks, years (I have no concept of time). It might have been a day, but I have no idea; maybe it was a year!
The stranger who took care of me was very nice and it was from her that I found out why I was there. Apparently my human parents were on a thing called a vacation.
I was stranded there without access to my blog, so since I just got home yesterday, I wanted to let you all know that I'm alive and well and already planning my revenge.
I was subjected to the final indignity of this misadventure this morning: my human mom weighed me and announced to the whole world that I had gained half a pound! That might mean that I was gone for more than a day because I couldn't possibly have gained 8 ounces in a day.
Now, I ask you, how would you like it? If you know what the thing is called, let me know so I can refer to it by its proper name.
