Nico speaks out about Marmalade and other things

Hello, it's been a long time but I'm back now and planning on writing about the joys, trials, and tribulations of my life over the past year.

You will notice that I've chosen a nice orange color for my text. That's because I've just learned that I'm a "marmalade cat" which sounds very ritzy and glitzy to me. Whassup with that? I'm not quite sure what marmalade actually is but if this name makes me sound as important as I feel, it's all good.

I don't know if this is yet another reason to boast about being me or if I ought to worry, but I have noticed my fur becoming more orange in color, hence the marmalade diagnosis. I used to be kind of beige or buff colored, and think my current condition may be due to my diet, but I have caught sight of myself in the mirror and do think I am quite hot looking with my deep color. I guess I'd compare it to the way a human would feel after a session at Beach Bum Tanning Salon.

It's been a pretty good year, all things considered. Let me mention that although I am even more handsome than ever, there is a slight possiblility I might have gained a bit of weight. I have noticed that when I engage in one of my absolute favorite activities, sprawling on the computer desk between the monitor and the keyboard, the space is a bit tighter than it used to be. Now, I could be wrong about this. People get new keyboards all the time, new monitors, too
Does wood shrink, by the way? I'd appreciate it if one of my many fans would let me know.

My humans wonder why I like to hang out at the computer. What they don't realize is there is a low level of heat coming from the monitor that is just the right temperature for me. I would compare it to the feeling you'd get if you lived in Costa Rica... nice, constant warm temperature. Just right, kind of like Goldilocks and her porridge.

After my frequent naps, I find myself waking up and wondering about my life. Some of the things on my mind are as follows:

• why the dog gets fed before I do -- this is patently unfair


• why my human mother keeps making up ridiculous names for me, such as "Mango"


• why, despite myself, I actually respond to the name Mango


• what happens when the humans leave the house


• whether the humans realize that I bite the dog's ears when they leave the house for more than an hour


• what they would do if they knew

It's time for me to snooze a bit. I had a bit of excitement this weekend when my second human mom came for a visit. As you may recall, I have had THREE of them. I cannot tell you how nice it was to see her again or how much I enjoyed letting my thick, stick-to-you fur get all over the dark dress she was wearing. I didn't exactly LMAO over it, but it's kind of fun seeing people get all frantic and wipe their hands all over their clothes after handling me. One of life's little joys.

In my next post, I'll tell all about how I was terrorized and had to hide for 3 days.